Friday, July 24, 2015

Inventorying My Stuff!!

So, I've gotten a little lax on my passion about living a minimal life. I bought a bigger rig... I think I told you that, but if I didn't... I am now. Sorry, I've become a sloppy blogger and lost all focus. That changes today!!

Every single item I own will be touched today, cataloged and if I know immediately that I don't want/need it, it goes. One more cup of coffee, then it's on.


Friday, June 12, 2015

Poison Ivy

Living this mobile, tiny lifestyle brings with it some challenges. We are currently on the river, and so far this year, so good as far as flooding goes. By now, we've typically had to evacuate at least once and sometimes twice. The biggest challenge we have had to face this year are the number of mating dragonflies and poison ivy. Last year, daughter had it six times and I had it four. The cat climbs on the river bank to get whatever tasty morsel he is going to kill next, rubs through the poison ivy then rubs on us. It's a huge problem, and one we haven't been able to solve.

Work has been busy and nuts, but I think I'm going to have a little time to breathe, meditate and do some yoga over the next couple of days and boy am I ready. Hope you lovely readers are well.

Ms. Minimal

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Let's Get Caught Up!

Ms. Minimal went crazy and bought a 31' bumper pull. It's the taj-ma-camper, with lots of space, but ironically less storage than my 22' motor home. I've had to get rid of some stuff, buy some different stuff and figure out where the heck to put stuff. I hate stuff so this has all been very overwhelming. I'm planning another thrashing of stuff down the road.

Currently, I am tying up a lot of loose ends. A complicated relationship situation is getting streamlined and I think I'm ready. [Emphasis on THINK] I'm finishing up my involvement with the board of directors at the resort I stay at part of the year. I'm ready for that to be over, too. I can go back to enjoying myself now instead of fielding questions from fellow drunken campers and no more typing minutes! WOOHOO! 

My birthday is tomorrow. I will be 43 and as I ponder my life and look back on the myriad of choices I have made, I do not regret any of them. They have all led me to where I am and I am happy with this place. More changes are coming and more growth is surely to come as well. Sometimes growth is painful, but I know from experience that pushing through the pain only brings joy on the other side. That's true for so many things in life.

My daughter is flying back from Denver tonight. She went for 5 days and left with only a small backpack. It was a joy to watch her pare down the items she wanted to take, focusing on only the most important stuff. Then watching her leave for almost a week with only a small bag. Less baggage is always good, literally and figuratively. She will return with a new lease on life. Traveling alone as a woman is empowering. I've never done it for sheer pleasure, only for work, but I know all too well how inspiring it is. I cannot WAIT to pick her up this evening and hear about all of the people she met and experiences she had.

Oh, the places we will go....

Ms. Minimal

Thursday, March 5, 2015

New Rules of Engagement- Good Fences Make Good 'Neighbors'

I have become an observer of human behavior and after doing several experiments over the years with various people in different sectors of my life from close family member to boss to spiritual friend, I have decided to implement some basic rules of engagement for communication purposes.

On Unsolicited Input:

I have learned that most people are not looking for my input, so not to offer my opinion on any unsolicited topic.
If a topic is solicited for input, to proceed cautiously! It may feel like they are looking for my input, and they may think they want my input, but neither of those may be true.
To limit my input to only the immediate topic. Give input that leans toward the positive.
Don't start pontificating, because it never ends well.

On Cohabitation Relationships:

I have been as happy if not happier being alone than I was when I was in a cohabitation relationship.
I gave too much of myself to cohabitation relationships.
I don't have time in my life for a cohabitation relationship.

On Friendship and In General:

I have let go of many, many people in my life over the past year and am better because of it.
Always come from a loving place.
Always give more than I take.
Always leave something nicer than I found it when I am able.
Do everything in my power to avoid relying on others and try to be as self-sufficient as possible.
Be gracious and grateful always.
Don't take others for granted.
If there is a behavior you are not comfortable with in a relationship, they may change temporarily but they typically cannot sustain it if it goes against who they are at their core.
Trust your gut.
Trust your Goddess.

No- It's a word. 

I should become familiar with it and use it.
Guilt should not dictate what I do.
If I do not want to do something, it is ok to say no.

My New Communication Rules: 

1. Placate, placate, placate.
2. Smile, nod, listen, repeat, affirm. Smile, nod, listen, repeat, affirm.
3. Give nothing detailed or personal, they won't even notice.
4. If someone wants my honest opinion, they will ask for it.
5. If I'm not adding value, I'm just adding noise. Shhh....
6. If I recognize that someone genuinely wants to hear me, rules 1-5 are null and void.

Good fences make good neighbors.

Ms. Minimal

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Be Careful What You Ask For

Because you just might get it....

I don't know that I've ever experienced true heartache. The times that I've severed relationships in the past, I was ready for it and have always lead the charge. The tail end may have been dictated by the other party, but the frame work was always put in place by moi and everything had a natural flow to it.

It didn't work that way this time. I made a rash decision and shot myself in the foot. I'm experiencing true heartache. It is unbearable, but I sit with it and pray and hope that it gets better.

The light in me recognizes the light in you.

Ms. Minimal

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Letting Go

Last night, I let go of someone in my life.

My heart is very heavy today.

Everything about the situation was good and exactly what I needed but he doubted me on more than one occasion. I have been doubted by people my whole life and have decided that if you do not trust me, you can no longer be in my life. I've trusted people to a fault, and it has cost me dearly over the years. I like to think that my judgement is better now and I am better able to determine when someone is not trustworthy but input from some close to me would indicate otherwise. I'll continue to work on that, but today I mourn.

I mourn the loss of something that was fantastic while it lasted.
I mourn the feeling of being adored.
I mourn having an ear when I needed it.

I fucking mourn.

I realize that my posts here are no longer about minimizing things, but more so about not allowing people or things in my life that no longer serve me well.

I know that I am worth respect and trust today.

You no trusty?
You go bye bye.

Although painful, I'm ok being alone today.

Ms. Minimal

Sunday, December 21, 2014


I have been a sufferer of Fibromyalgia for ten years now. At one point, I almost had it beat and had way more good days than bad. Somewhere along the way, that shifted and I'm almost back to the level of debilitation that I had after I was initially struck with it. I think that I've moved away from the healthy habits that facilitated less pain. I started drinking soda regularly again, eating wheat, sugar, dairy and meat, and probably drinking way too much. Not alcoholic level drinking, just more than my body can comfortably handle.

We are headed to IL for the holidays and I will be in the car for 12 hours tomorrow. A road trip is not a good place to try to get your eating back on track, but I fear I have no choice. I need to start today. Start changing the way I eat again, getting back to the gentle but quick walks that I was taking with the dogs outside instead of the vigorous elliptical sessions I was putting myself through for 5 or 6 weeks. I don't think my body can handle that level of intensity. I pushed myself too far. I need to get back to gentle stretching, yoga, walking, meditating, drinking water and tea, kinder foods. 

I am responsible for the flare up that I am dealing with. I did it all to myself. I am the only one that can turn it around. I must do it to get my pain level down from a 8 to 10 to more of a 2 to 4, which is livable.  Pain is with me daily, but normally just a whisper. I don't mind the whisper anymore. I've kind of accepted it as part of who I am. 

Today, it's screams. Sheeting nerve pain over most areas of my skin, which makes clothing uncomfortable. Fatigue in my muscles to the point that I can't hold an arm up for more than a few seconds without shooting pain through the muscles, meaning folding my laundry is a slow process. And muscular pain from just putting my arm on a table or the way my leg sits on the chair or the way my feet sit on the floor. Holding a coffee cup is a two-handed job. I don't really ever talk about the details of what the pain is like, but putting it in writing somehow makes it less dark. It can't hide in the closet anymore. 

I want to scream. 

I have been in tears all day. 

Living this way is not a life. 

I'm moving into the third week of this and as time ticks on, thoughts get skewed. I am not at risk of doing anything stupid, because I can separate the thought from the action, but if I knew that the rest of my life would be spent like this, I don't know that I could do it. 

Many years ago, I stopped talking to other people that have fibromyalgia because they want to compare notes about how horrible it is instead of swapping ideas on how to feel better. At this point, I feel like I need to reach out to the community to find some support. I don't want to go back on medication though.. that was no life. I was a zombie. 

This blog isn't really tiny life related, but it's my life and right now I felt compelled to write about it. 

Ms. Minimal